emails i can’t send (2022) – angol dalszöveg |
emails i can’t send (2022)
It's times like these, wish I had a time machine So I could see what you did October 13th At 10:15, were you really asleep? Were you lyin' to me and the family? There's no "us" in us when I'm lackin' trust You wanna discuss, ugh, you disgust me Don't make me cuss you out, why'd you let me down? Don't say sorry now And thanks to you, I, I can't love right I get nice guys and villainize them Read their texts like they're havin' sex right now Scared I'll find out that it's true And if I do, then I blame you For every worst that I assume When I'm forty-five, someone calls me their wife And he fucks our lives in one selfish night Don't think I'll find forgiveness as fast as mom did And God, I love you, but you're such a dipshit Please fuckin' fix this 'Cause you were all I looked up to Now I can't even look at you (You too) I mean, as they say in Chicago "He had it comin'" One year, ten thousand bad moments But it was dressed up in heated emotion, and I tried to look for the best in the worst But, like, fuck me, that caused a commotion You're lucky I'm a private person I've quietly carried your burden, and Everyone thinks you're an angel But, shit, I would probably use different wordin' Oh, you're so vicious Love me, then pretend you didn't Crush my heart and wreck my image Why you gotta be so vicious? You like a certain type of woman Who's smart but neglects intuition When you're insecure, could be me, could be her You just run to whoever is winnin' Said that it was me and you for life Now you're kinda actin' like I died Oh, you're so vicious Love me, then pretend you didn't Crush my heart and wreck my image Why you gotta be so, so, so Oh, you're so vicious Love me, then pretend you didn't Half of me just can't resist it Why you gotta be so vicious? Oh, no Why you gotta be so Oh, oh Why you gotta be so vicious? You don't feel remorse, you don't feel the effects 'Cause you don't think you hurt me if you wish me the best I should have known all along, I was only the next one To take your love songs as a promise Oh, you're so vicious I loved you but I wish I didn't If you're out there somewhere, listenin' Why you gotta be so vicious? Made it clear when you told me Don't know why but you gotta be lonely Say it's hard but you make it look easy So I'm trying to live in reality Decompressing Tryna ease the tension But you got me stressing Feeling like I need to call when you sneak up on me Tell me that you miss me in your life I can't read your mind You say that you need to be alone But night and day Want me at your beck and call You say you know That you might be crossing a line Wasting all our time To think that we could be casual You're not my friend And, baby, you never were Why the fuss if you say you just wanna be mine? I can't read your mind Tell me what's gonna happen When it's you and me in a room but you know you can't have it? Oh I'll be laughing When you say that you really have changed Finally found your way 'Cause I'm close to your face Double-checking Did I get the message in the way you intended? Got me second-guessing when you sneak up on me Tell me that you need me in your life I can't read your mind You say that you need to be alone But night and day Want me at your beck and call You say you know That you might be crossing a line Wasting all our time To think that we could be casual You're not my friend And, baby, you never were Why the fuss if you say you just wanna be mine? I can't read your mind You say that you need to be alone But night and day Want me at your beck and call You say you know That you might be crossing a line I can't read your mind You say that you need to be alone But night and day Want me at your beck and call (Want me at your beck and call) You say you know That you might be crossing a line Wasting all our time To think that we could be casual (Think) You're not my friend (You're not my friend) And, baby, you never were Why the fuss if you say you just wanna be mine? (Why the fuss?) I can't read your mind We were never in the park Talking on a seesaw, teetering with our feelings in the dark Ignoring tornado warnings He didn't hold me in his arms We didn't stumble over the pages of our relationship arc Ignoring tornado warnings Don't understand how quickly we get Right back in our rhythm without missing a step And logically, the last thing I should have on my mind But I want you there sometimes I guess maybe that's why I'm lying to my therapist I keep saying things like "I never saw him and we never kissed" Now I think, somehow, in my mind If I could convince him if he doesn't see it, then maybe it doesn't exist I think he's onto me every time I say I'm over that son of a bitch I'm lying to my therapist I deserve an hour in a week To focus on my thoughts Not so obsessed with yours, I can't hear myself speak I deserve my own consideration But sometimes I wish I kept Some of my feelings in the basement So I'd still have some left Don't understand how quickly we get Right back in our rhythm without missing a step And logically, the last thing I should have on my mind But I want you there sometimes I guess maybe that's why I'm lying to my therapist I keep saying things like "I never saw him and we never kissed" Now I think, somehow, in my mind If I could convince him if he doesn't see it, then maybe it doesn't exist I think he's onto me every time I say I'm over that son of a bitch I'm lying to my therapist I'll drive you home You drive me crazy But that's not gonna stop me I'll call you out You call me "baby" But that's not gonna stop me From lying to my therapist I keep saying things like "I never saw him and we never kissed" Now I think, somehow, in my mind If I could convince him if he doesn't see it then maybe it doesn't exist I think he's onto me every time I say I'm over that son of a bitch I'm lying to my therapist I said I wanted Thin Mints and you said you knew a guy You showed up with a boombox and stars in your eyes Who knew cuddling on trampolines could be so reckless? We bonded over Black Eyed Peas and complicated exes Fell so deeply into it It was all so innocent Now I'm a homewrecker, I'm a slut I got death threats fillin' up semitrucks Tell me who I am, guess I don't have a choice All because I liked— I'm the hot topic on your tongue I'm a rebound gettin' 'round stealin' from the young Tell me who I am, guess I don't have a choice All because I liked a boy Ah, mm I'm not catastrophizing, everything's derailing Was only tryna hold you close while your heart was failing It's not internet illusion, just two kids going through it You said I'm too late to be your first love, but I'll always be your favorite Now I'm a homewrecker, I'm a slut I got death threats fillin' up semitrucks Tell me who I am, guess I don't have a choice All because I liked— I'm the hot topic on your tongue I'm a rebound gettin' 'round stealin' from the young Tell me who I am, guess I don't have a choice All because I liked a boy Ah Ah Ah All because I liked a boy Fell so deeply into it It was all so innocent Dating boys with exes No, I wouldn't recommend it I'm a homewrecker, I'm a slut I got death threats fillin' up semitrucks Tell me who I am, guess I don't have a choice All because I liked a boy And all of this for what? When everything went down, we'd already broken up Please tell me who I am, guess I don't have a choice All because I liked a boy Ah (A boy) Ah (A boy) Ah All because I liked a boy We been talkin' for hours 'bout how we shouldn't talk for hours on end Kissing after a conversation 'bout how we'd probably be better off as friends Same time here next weekend Say we won't do this again Make me fall where I stand Only like you can Yeah, I say I'm done, but I'm still confused How am I supposed to close the door when I still need the closure? And I change my mind, but it's still on you How am I supposed to leave you now that you're already over? How am I supposed to leave you now that you're already over? Selfishly don't wanna give you time to be on someone else's lips But I'll take 3 short hours over 3 long weeks pretending like we don't exist Same time here next weekend Say we won't do this again Make me fall where I stand Only like you can Yeah, I say I'm done, but I'm still confused How am I supposed to close the door when I still need the closure? And I change my mind, but it's still on you How am I supposed to leave you now that you're already over? How am I supposed to leave you now that you're already over? After the aftermath I know you'll be coming back to the back bedroom And it won't be the last of the aftermath I know you'll be coming back to the back bedroom And it won't be the last time I say I'm done, but I'm still confused How am I supposed to close the door when I still need the closure? And I change my mind, but it's still on you How am I supposed to leave you now that you're already over? Yeah, I like my bed, but it likes you too How am I supposed to leave you now that you're already over? You used a fork once It turns out forks are fuckin' everywhere There's no hidin' from the thought of us I got ways to find you anywhere We sat on the roof once Conversation took us everywhere And we talked until the sun came up I wish we stayed just like we were up there I consider you, I’m not trying to It doesn't matter whether not I want to I can't help it, it's a habit Your corner in my mind is well-established I, I wonder how many things you think about before you get to me I wonder how many things you wanna do, you think I'm in-between I feel myself falling further down your priorities And I still make excuses for you constantly I wonder how many things you think about before Before you get to me Remember when you left once? That never made too much sense to me Well, it hurt you so bad, hurting me You really came to me for sympathy Oh, I consider you, and I'm not trying to It doesn't matter whether not I want to I can't help it, it's a habit Your corner in my mind is well-established I, I wonder how many things you think about before you get to me I wonder how many things you wanna do, you think I'm in-between And I feel myself falling further down your priorities And I still make excuses for you constantly I wonder how many things you think about before Before you get to me Am I not Even a second thought? I wonder how many things you think about before you get to me I wonder how many things you wanna do, you think I'm in-between I feel myself falling further down your priorities And I still make excuses for you constantly I wonder how many things you think about before Before you get to me Wonder how many things Told me, told me I'm your only It's all unfolding, babe Slowly, slowly, lies you sold me All saw the light of day You been wastin' time on the other side If you're satisfied, touché Now you say you hate all the empty space And if you could go back, you'd stay Didn't think about it when you let me down Hurts to see me out of your reach Bet you wanna touch me now It's cold out there, let me know what you found (Let me know what you found) Bet you wanna love me now Bet you wanna love me now Chase me, chase me, that's right, baby Yeah, feel the way it feels When you don't have control of who I'm holdin' Is it feeding all your fears? You been wastin' time on the other side If you're satisfied, touché But the lights are off, your so-called friends are gone Oh, I know what you're 'bout to say Didn't think about it when you let me down Hurts to see me out of your reach Bet you wanna touch me now It's cold out there, let me know what you found (Let me know what you found) Bet you wanna love me now Bet you wanna love me now Didn't think about it when you let me down Hurts to see me out of your reach Bet you wanna touch me now It's cold out there, let me know what you found (Let me know what you found) Bet you wanna love me now Bet you wanna love me now I bet you wanna I bet you wanna Bet you miss me, bet you're reminiscin' I bet you hate the way that you said goodbye And you still can't even tell me why I hate the way that you left me dry But I'll keep that between you and I I bet you didn't think about it when you let me down Hurts to see me out of your reach Bet you wanna touch me now (Oh, touch me now) It's cold out there, let me know what you found Bet you wanna love me now (Uh-huh) Bet you wanna love me now Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh (Oh-oh, la-la) Da-ah, ah-ah, ah-ah-ah Uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh, uh-huh Yeah Think I only want one number in my phone I might change your contact to "Don't Leave Me Alone" You said you like my eyes and you like to make 'em roll Treat me like a queen, now you got me feelin' thrown, oh But I can't help myself when you get close to me Baby, my tongue goes numb, sounds like "bleh-blah-blee" I don't want no one else (No, no), baby, I'm in too deep Here's a lil' song I wrote (A song I wrote), it's about you and me (Me) I'll be honest Lookin' at you got me thinkin' nonsense Cartwheels in my stomach when you walk in And when you got your arms around me Oh, it feels so good I had to jump the octave I think I got an ex, but I forgot him And I can't find my chill, I must've lost it I don't even know, I'm talkin' nonsense I'm talkin', I'm talkin' (Ah-ah-ah-ah) I'm talkin' all around the clock I'm talkin' hope nobody knocks I'm talkin' opposite of soft I'm talkin' wild, wild thoughts You gotta keep up with me I got some young energy I caught the L-O-V-E How do you do this to me? But I can't help myself when you get close to me Baby, my tongue goes numb, sounds like "bleh-blah-bleh-blee" And I don't want no one else (No, no), baby, I'm in too deep (Too deep) Here's a lil' song I wrote (A song I wrote), it's about you and me I'll be honest (Honest) Lookin' at you got me thinkin' nonsense (Nonsense) Cartwheels in my stomach when you walk in (When you walk in) When you got your arms around me Oh, it feels so good I had to hit the octave I think I got an ex, but I forgot him And I can't find my chill, I must've lost it I don't even know, I'm talkin' nonsense (Oh-oh) I'm talkin', I'm talkin', I'm talkin' I'm talkin', I'm talkin' (Na-na-na), I'm talkin' (Blah-blah, blah-blah) Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah (Ah-ah) I don't even know anymore (Oh) This song catchier than chickenpox is I bet your house is where my other sock is Woke up this morning, thought I'd write a pop hit, ha-ha How quickly can you take your clothes off? Pop quiz That one's not gonna make it Most of these aren't gonna make— Sun's up too soon like daylight savings Mixed emotions are congregating Picturin' us in all these places Ahead of myself's an understatement Sky looks so purple, I can taste it Couple days in, I call you "baby" Three stories up here contemplatin' But what the fuck is patience? These are fast times and fast nights, yeah No time for rewrites, we couldn't help it Outlines on bed sides, yeah Give me a second to forget I ever really meant it Fast times and fast nights, yeah Closed eyes and closed blinds, we couldn't help it Outlines on bed sides, yeah Give me a second to forget I ever really meant it My feelings used to be serrated But you speak in such a perfect cadence Tiptoeing past so many stages But what the fuck is patience? These are fast times and fast nights, yeah No time for rewrites, we couldn't help it Outlines on bed sides, yeah Give me a second to forget I ever really meant it Fast times and fast nights, yeah Closed eyes and closed blinds, we couldn't help it Outlines on bed sides, yeah Give me a second to forget I ever really meant it These, these are These are the fast times These, these are These are the— Fast times and fast nights, yeah (Yeah) No time for rewrites, we couldn't help it Outlines on bed sides, yeah (Yeah) Give me a second to forget I ever really meant it Fast times and fast nights, yeah Closed eyes and closed blinds, we couldn't help it Outlines on bed sides, yeah Give me a second to forget I ever really meant it It'll be a Wednesday And I'll be going to this coffee shop Hear the barista call an oat-milk latte and your name And I look up from my phone And think there's no chance it's you, but it is You'll say, "Hi", I'll say, "Hi. How are you?" You'll say, "How's your family? How's your sister?" I'll say, "Shannon's being Shannon." After a minute of nonsensical chatter, you'll say "Well, this was really nice. Maybe we should do this on purpose sometime." And it'll have been long enough that we won't harp on (Mmm-hmm) Arguments in your garage All the ways we sabotaged it (Mmm-hmm) What it was and what it wasn't We've been swimming on the edge of a cliff I'm resistant, but going down with the ship It'd be so nice, right? Right? If we could take it all off and just exist And skinny dip in water under the bridge You'll suggest a restaurant we used to go to And I'll say, "Won't that be too nostalgic?" And you'll say, "Maybe, but let's do it anyway" We won't sit at our same old table, I promise And we won't bring up the past, we'll keep it bureaucratic And we won't say it But both of us, we'll be thinking about how different we are From those scared little kids that had those (Mmm-hmm) Arguments in your garage All the ways we sabotaged it (Mmm-hmm) What it was and what it wasn't We've been swimming on the edge of a cliff I'm resistant, but going down with the ship It'd be so nice, right? Right? If we could take it all off and just exist And skinny dip in water under the bridge Ah-ha-ha, ah-ha, ah-ha, ha Ah-ha-ha, ah-ha, ah-ha, ha Ah-ha-ha, ah-ha, ah-ha, ha Ah-ha-ha, ah-ha, ah-ha, ha We've been swimming on the edge of a cliff I'm resistant, but going down with the ship It'd be so nice, right? Right? If we could take it all off and just exist And skinny dip in water under the bridge He's good for my heart, but he's bad for business Tears me apart when he grants my wishes All of my friends think I've gone crazy But they don't know me like my baby (Ba—, ba—, ba—, ba—) We look good in photographs, I like the way you like to laugh At dirty jokes, I know they'll always land Used to get to work on time, but now you're taking up my nights Never been so glad to be so tired Ooh, I'm mad for you It's sad but true and I know it Ah, you're on my mind You stole my life and it's showin' (Baby) He's good for my heart, but he's bad for business Tears me apart when he grants my wishes All of my friends think I've gone crazy But they don't know me like my baby If I'm just writing happy songs, will anybody sing along? You had to go and break into my head And I would try to fight these feelings, I can't find a single reason I'd make all the same mistakes again, ah Ooh, I'm mad for you It's sad but true and I know it Ah, you're on my mind You stole my life and it's showin' (Ba—, ba—, ba—) He's good for my heart, but he's bad for business Tears me apart when he grants my wishes All of my friends think I've gone crazy But they don't know me like my baby He's good (Good), it's bad (Bad) The best I've ever had (Best I've ever had) And he's so nice, it's sad (It's sad) He ruined all my plans And he just makes me so crazy I know everyone sees That he'll be the death of me He's good for my heart, but he's bad for business (He's very bad for business) Tears me apart when he grants my wishes All of my friends think I've gone crazy But they don't know me like my baby He's good for my heart, but he's bad for business (So bad) Tears me apart when he grants my wishes All of my friends think I've gone crazy But they don't know me like my baby ou're good at the falling, not the staying there You're good at the giving too much, then getting scared You're good at impersonating someone who cares And you had me for a minute there But now I wonder why I let your confusion keep me up at night I'm so tired Re-read every single undertone and I Overanalyzed it Front, back and beside it Where else can we go? There's nothing left here to decode Done lookin' for signs in The gaps and the silence It's just getting old There's nothing left here to decode Mmm There's a weight off my shoulders now that I don't chase you Being myself, did that emasculate you? Learning from you that I can walk away too And you had me for a minute too But now I wonder why I let your indecision keep me up at night I'm so tired Unpacked every single word you wrote, and I Overanalyzed it Front, back and beside it Where else can we go? There's nothing left here to decode Done lookin' for signs in The gaps and the silence It's just getting old There's nothing left here to decode Mmm There's nothing left here to decode Mmm Now I wonder why I let your confusion keep me up at night I'm so tired Re-read every single undertone and I Overanalyzed it Front, back and beside it Where else can we go? There's nothing left here to decode Done lookin' for signs in The gaps and the silence It's just getting old There's nothing left here to decode There's nothing, there's nothing There's nothing There's nothing left here to decode There's nothing, there's nothing There's nothing There's nothing left here to decode I wanna make a video to our future selves Oh so you do have a type? And it's not me Oh so you can reply? Just to not me If you wanted brown eyes I could have got contacts So y'all are in Paris now? Guess it's public Face like that other girl You're in love with You knew I would see that You knew I would notice She looks nothing like me Can't really tell should I be Tryna take it as a compliment It's kinda feeling like the opposite She looks nothing like me So why do you look so happy? Now I think I get the cause of it You were holding out to find the opposite And I know now Even if I tried to change That somehow You'd end up with her anyway Oh I know now Even if I tried to change That somehow You'd end up with her anyway Does she say nothing so you feel good? Does she step out of the spotlight so you bathe in it? Does she get up on top of you more than I would? Does she just love the picture 'cause you're painting it? I care but I don't Just wondering when you Said I'm beautiful Was I being lied to? She looks nothing like me Can't really tell should I be Tryna take it as a compliment It's kinda feeling like the opposite She looks nothing like me So why do you look so happy? Now I think I get the cause of it You were holding out to find the opposite And I know now Even if I tried to change That somehow You'd end up with her anyway Oh I know now Even if I tried to change That somehow You'd end up with her anyway End up with her anyway (Do-do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do) (Do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do) Oh, not another take Oh, it's like that I'm your dream come true when it's on a platter for you Then you pull back When I try to make plans more than two hours in advance mm I slam the door I hit "Ignore" I'm saying, "No, no, no, no more." I got you blocked after this an after thought I finally cut you off I feel so much lighter, like a feather with you off my mind, ah Floating through the memories, like whatever, you're a waste of time, ah Your signals are mixed You act like a bitch You fit every stereotype, "Send a pic" I feel so much lighter, like a feather with you out my life With you out my life (Do-do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do) (Do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do) Like a feather, like a feather, like a feather, yeah It feels so good Not caring where you are tonight And it feels so good Not pretending to like the wine you like I slam the door (slam the door) I hit "Ignore" (Hit "Ignore") I'm saying, "No, no, no, no more." I got you blocked Excited to never talk I, I'm so sorry for your loss I feel so much lighter, like a feather with you off my mind, ah Floating through the memories, like whatever, you're a waste of time, ah Your signals are mixed You act like a bitch (A bitch) You fit every stereotype, "Send a pic" I feel so much lighter, like a feather with you out my life With you out my life (Do-do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do) Ah, mm (Do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do, do-do-do) Like a feather, like a feather, like a feather You want me? I'm done You miss me? No duh Where I'm at, I'm up Where I'm at You want me? I'm done (I'm done) You miss me? No duh (No duh) Where I'm at, I'm up (I'm up) Where I'm at You want me? I'm done. You miss me? No duh I feel so much lighter like a feather with you off my mind Where I'm at, I'm up, where I'm at Like a feather, like a feather, like a feather You want me? I'm done. You miss me? No duh I feel so much lighter like a feather with you off my mind Where I'm at, I'm up, where I'm at Like a feather, like a feather, like a feather, yeah If I fall in love with all my problems, will they leave me too? Well maybe I believed in all your lies, 'cause I believed in you Why were you somewhere else when you were next to me? I know, you know, it keeps me up Did you think about her face with your hands around my waist? Did you even give a fuck? You can't spell lonesome without me, mmm, mmm, mmm And there's no hope in misery, mmm, mmm, mmm I can't escape your history, oh You can't spell lonesome without me, you just can't Tell me I was more than just a decent opportunity Or will you tell me anything I wanna hear to control how you're perceived? Why were you somewhere else when you were next to me? I know, you know, it keeps me up Isn't it kind of strange how it all changed when I wasn't the one they wanted you to love You can't spell lonesome without me, mmm, mmm, mmm And there's no hope in misery, mmm, mmm, mmm I can't escape your history, oh You can't spell lonesome without me, you just can't Baby, sorry I left you in the dark I always reach for your leg over there on your side of the car Baby, everything reminds me of you Nobody gets my jokes, everyone here thinks I'm fuckin' rude When I saw you cry, I didn't handle it well Without you here I don't know what to do with myself I think about these things at night Before I fall asleep Things I wish you said to me Things like darling, I hope you know it scared me to death The night that your sister said that you got in an accident And God I, I'm watching everything that you do I can't get your songs out of my head, or your hair out of my room I saw you met somebody and I'm jealous as hell That I can't even stomach loving somebody else I think about these things at night before I fall asleep Things I wish you said to me Sorry that I pulled the it's not you, it's me One day I'll make sure you get a real apology I'll waste my time, I'll waste my life on idiotic things Like things you never said, things you'll never say to me |